It shouldn't Be Me

I don't know how long it will take to post this story and I will probably end up doing it in stages. God is SO Good to me and had blessed me so much that I want to give Him the glory for everything in my life. I have six healthy and gorgeous kids and now a son in law and grand daughter. I have been married for 23 years to the same boy I fell in love with when I was a junior in High school. My life should not be this way. I don't deserve this life. I have been a stay at home mom for the past 2o years and have home schooled all of my kids. It wasn't supposed to work out like this and I am not sure how it happened, other than the Lord Jesus gave me this life to show me and others how much He Loves Us!
When I was born, some wonderful people helped my mother by giving her a place to stay and paying for my hospital bill. My mother was patiently waiting for my dad to find a job and a home for us in Oklahoma, while mom was learning to be a new mom in Dover, Delaware, in the home of Bob and Doris Mahaffey. when dad sent for us, I was a month old and headed for Oklahoma. My life was pretty typical with mom and dad, except that dad had a problem and always had women on the side. When I was four years old, the family included Dana my two year old sister and my mom, Gale, was pregnant with my baby sister Michelle. That summer, my dad went to "work" in the morning and in reality, he went to his girlfriend "Nancy's" house. He finally disappeared completely when mom was very close to having the baby. She was frantic and called on my grandpa Don and my Uncle roger to help us. The family took care uf us while my mom was in the hospital. Michelle had Hyaline Membrane disease and only lived one day. My grandpa Don arranged the funeral for Michelle. Mom had to get on welfare for us. My dad came back then wanting to know where his baby was to be told, she is dead. After several years of dad promising to do better, attending this church or that, telling mom he had become a Christian and was reading his Bible, she finally left him realizing that Christianity to dad was just a get out of Jail free card and it really meant nothing. She realized that he would never be faithful to her. They divorced in 1973. I didn't see dad for about 10 years. My mom tried to arrange meetings with him, but he would not show up. We asked my uncle and Aunt if they knew where he was, they always said they didn't know, even though he lived with them at times and they saw him on a semi-regular basis.
My mom re-married when I was 5 years old to a pretty nice man. we thought he was "Daddy" and he was a hard worker and pretty nice generally. His dad was an old man who liked to do naughty things to little girls. We called him Granddaddy. His wife was a bitter woman we called Granny. We and the other granddaughters would stay at their house at times when our parents were away of at work. Granddaddy would do really disgusting things to all the girls. sometimes he would be in his recliner with a little girl on his lap, and granny would be in her recliner next to his and she would not stop him or say a word. He would do even worse things to us when granny was gone and we were alone with him. Dana and I would try to get away from him by going out side. We finally moved away from them when I was in 2nd grade. We moved back and forth from Texas to California for several years. When in Cal. and in 3rd grade, my step dad started showing his private parts to me. I didn't know how to take this, and I am thankful that he never did the things to me that his dad did. I pray for him and think he was just a very confused man. we got away from him when I was in 6th grade and I think more would have happened if we didn't get away from him. In 6th grade, we moved back to Texas then Oklahoma after mom divorced my step dad. She had just gotten a good van, a good job, and a nice rent house when she was killed in a car wreck. Dana and I were just 10 and 12. Our grandparents adopted us and we know our grandpa Don loved us, but his wife had never had children and didn't like them. She was not happy about having to raise us and let us know it frequently. One good thing about living with our grandparents is that Grandpa went to church faithfully and we both came to know the Lord at the Baptist church we attended. this is part one